You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I accidentally had phone sex last night
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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