Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I have grass duct taped all over my body
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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