forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
