nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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