They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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