Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
