THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Well I just put wine in my tea
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
