Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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