3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize