DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
