That's intense
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
My penis needs a shock collar
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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