i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
