I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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