I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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