I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
try to milk me bitch
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