we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
