i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Randomize
