He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
