To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
