No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I need to wash the frat house off of me
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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