Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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