The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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