Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize