so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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