weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
