Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Randomize
