Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
40s are totally the cure
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
