Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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