I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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