Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
