So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
