that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
The Olympian is in my bed
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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