shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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