You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
You can't motorboat a personality
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Edward fifth and chaser hands
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
