But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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