Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
