the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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