just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Still dying that you shit outside
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
