Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
why do cheetos always look like penises
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
