R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
