You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I know her cup size but not her name....
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