'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
