I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
