ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
It's blow job season.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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