I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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