I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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