I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
