is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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