Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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