i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
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