Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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