so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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